Back when we lived in London, our local pub was The Old White Bear (my all-time favorite pub, tragically closed due to developer greed). The only good thing that came from the closing was that many of the staff were pushed into more actively pursuing their dreams as performing artists.

One of our OWB friends, Antonio started a band called Jesus John & Whitney. We loved to see these guys play. They have some great tunes (Leaving Maida Vale is my personal favorite) and Antonio always got the crowd into the show. At one show or another, Trish, our friend Ashwin or I ended up on stage for the last song.

I might have been the only superfan who gave both positive and constructive feedback. I think it started accidentally when I asked James (who seemed to have a new guitar at every show) if he had done something different on One Day (always a crowd-pleaser) as it sounded different (oops, no).

After that, they always asked me how I thought the show went. It is tricky giving feedback to someone you care about. Do they need a cheerleader or a coach? You can help them feel better or help them be better…or maybe with the right words, you can do both. Giving great feedback is a skill you need to develop and practise.

I am a firm believer in being open and honest. The unintended consequence of giving someone sugar-coated feedback – maybe it does not have much value for them, and in the end, does not do much for you either.

When someone asks you for feedback, are you honest or do you tell them what you believe they want to hear?